The presence of plus-ones is a huge talking point amongst newly engaged couples. There are many reasons why you may allow plus-ones at your wedding, and just as many for not permitting your guests to bring a plus-one of their choice. The comfort factor is perhaps one of the most common reasons for inviting plus ones to a wedding as Zola details:
“It’s likely that you have numerous friends and relatives who might not know many people at your wedding. By allowing a plus-one, you’re putting those guests at ease, as well as increasing the chances of them having a good time. For those who are extremely dedicated to the comfort of their guests, this might be something to consider when making both planning and financial decisions.”
If you have an attitude of ‘the more, the merrier’ when planning your wedding, you’ll want to follow these etiquette rules to ensure the pros of plus-ones can be realised without adding too much extra expense or offending your other guests.
Remember, not every guest has to have a plus-one
It’s ok to allow just some of your guests to have plus-ones. Choosing who should receive a plus-one is simpler than you think, with members of the immediate family given priority. The VIPs that make up your wedding party (including your bridesmaids and groomsmen) should also be given the same courtesy.
Guests who are travelling long distances to attend your wedding and/or know very few of your other wedding guests can be given plus-ones too if numbers allow.
Turn to tradition for additional guidance
Traditionally, guests who are married, engaged or living with their partner should be given a plus-one. This is by no means a rule that’s set in stone. You may feel that certain single guests will be more comfortable with a plus-one in tow.
If you were invited to the wedding of one of your guests and given your own plus-one, don’t feel inclined to return the favour. Every couple is different, and what worked for their wedding may not necessarily work for yours.
If they’re invited with a plus-one, say it!
When communicating whether plus-ones are invited or not, it’s all in the wording of your wedding invitations. Whilst you don’t have to specify if you expect the wedding guest named on the invite to go it alone, you do have to include if they can have a guest of their own.
It really is as simple as following their name with ‘and guest’. If you know the name of their intended plus-one, you can address your invite to them both. If you’re not permitting a plus-one, just name your guest on the wedding invite.
Have a response ready for people asking
It’s inevitable that the odd guest will ask if they can bring a plus-one, no matter how clear your wedding invitations are, so be ready with a response. Using the ‘intimate wedding’ card is a great way to shut this topic of conversation down politely. Most guests will respect your wishes and not pursue the issue any further.
